Peace dollar. Note the eagle with folded wings on the reverse, a tranquil posture differing radically from the warlike birds on other U.S. coins.

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July 2, 2005:

Sinking, roller-coaster feeling, that the ground is falling from beneath you, that the calamity you've feared so long has finally befallen, after so many years and so much care.

"I lost it. I lost it..."

Anger, depression, disappointment in yourself. Fool.

Hope, suddenly. "Is it..?" No.

Learn to live with it.

Wait, no, yes, look in. Relax. It was strange to put it there. But it's safe.

Buddha warned against attachment to things.

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