For most of my life I lived with the fantasy that if only I had a different lover everything would be better.
It's probably the standard garden-variety fantasy that salvation comes from outside. It felt like grasping for a life rope.
I don't have that fantasy now. I just want to be alone. Left to rest, recuperate, reconnect with my own life.
I know that's not possible. I took on this committment. I will uphold my responsibility.
Still the fantasy is strong, and strikingly sad.
Go back to the December TOC
Go back to the main workbook page
© 2002-2012 Mark Phillips.
All rights reserved.
This writing is fiction. Please don't confuse it with reality.