June 26, 2005:

She had her first orgasm as a child, shimmying up one of the poles which held her family's backyard swingset in place.

"Mom! Mom! What was that?!," she gasped, amazed.

Her mother, prairie Protestant stock and one of the world's great deniers, told her, unable to contain either her laughter or her alarm, "Nevermind that! Go swim in the pool."