July 10, 2007:
Panic attacks, unspecified, the sense that something is wrong at home and that you must be there to take care of it, to look after her, to prevent her from harming herself or the house or the neighbors or the world.
Codependency, where you take responsibility for another's health. Not just hers, but everyone's she comes into contact with. As though it's your job to be a condom around her infection.
Distracted, agitated, with greater urgency as the day grows old. Turning frantic, so that you want to leave early, and frequently do.
Fully aware of the harm this causes you. Unwilling, from loyalty or stubbornness, to abandon the woman you love.